I am not in this to be angry

Think about one thing that occupies your mind. It could be a recent obsession, e.g. with a hobby, some work going on, a relationship even.

Now think about what made you to start this.

Was it to spark joy?

In some Eastern settings, people might refer to this initial feeling as 初心 or 'heart at the beginning'. It takes a lot sometimes, to maintain this young heart. Not surprisingly, it takes very little to lose it.

Master Jindai loved orchids, so he planted many precious species around the temple garden. One day, he had to leave the temple to attend to some affairs. Before leaving, he reminded his disciples to take care of the orchids for him while he was away.

After he left, his disciples tended to the orchids by watering them every day. Unfortunately, one of them accidentally bumped against a shelf, and down came all the precious pots of orchids. The disciple was ashamed and thought to himself: "I have destroyed my master’s beloved orchid plants, he is going to get so angry!".

When Master Jindai returned from his trip, the disciple told him what happened and asked for forgiveness. To his surprise, instead of being scolded, the Master comforted him and said: "I planted these orchids to beautify the environment and to offer them to the Buddha, not so that I could get angry!".

There is a saying, that "Loving-kindness ends greed; compassion ends anger". It is a virtue which I believe is worth reflecting on from time to time, especially when life gets challenging.

Ask yourself:

Why of course not! So keep at it, change your negative perspective, be like Master Jindai who remembered why he started. Not so that he could be angry, but so that he was surrounded by beauty.

Sure, there is always the path of escape. You hear about (rich) university dropouts, divorces (with expensive lawyer fees) and resignation letters ('politely' handed in).

Personally, though I've tried sticking to things, I have ran away many times in a sense:

The hardest part in all of them I think, was in changing people. People means either myself, or others. Being an introvert, I know my limits of influence, preferring passive ways of handling situations even though they may not work.

Tolerance is a thing, a sign of maturity if you will.

Now I can't say I've gone through a hard life or anything. Like sure, I remember being bullied by a neighbour at one point in my childhood. But the bully moved away a few months later, and I moved on. Over time, I gradually learn that stuff happens outside your control, and you need to learn to put up with it.

I told myself to persist in the face of challenges, to give people a second chance, a third one even. Having this high tolerance might mean a degree of insensitivity. It doesn't mean however, that I can be insensitive to what's happening in other people's lives. At the same time, who on Earth has the mental capacity to handle nonsense (political or otherwise)?

The people who care do.

Blind tolerance is not true compassion. Real compassion takes effort, it requires a persistent attitude, it is not a passive act. It requires me to be soft at times, and hard-headed at times.

Above all, I think I need to try to remember one simple fact. That I am not in this to be angry. I am not here to rant (too much), or bring more negativity into the world.

There is only so much I can do, but I will try my best. To follow the right path ahead, while remembering why I set out on this journey.

What I would love to do, is to share some ideas. Having gone through the hard yards researching bits and pieces here and there. On different ways of looking at things, or doing things.

So read on with an open heart. News only appear fresh because you have been tunnelling your vision on one thing for too long. Turn your head, and look away from your phone/computer.

Saw something new?

Hopefully in due time, you will exercise some muscles. To think anew. And find out what it takes, to have lasting happiness.